Monthly Archives: July 2011

24Jul

Real Men aint wimps Part 2. “Friendly Fire.”

Posted in Carl's Thoughts | 1 Comment

I promised in the opening paragraphs of my recent Blog Post “real men ain’t wimps” that I would clarify my comments in more detail over the next few months.  What I’ve therefore decided to do is work through each point one by one. First up is the whole issue of what we might call “friendly fire.”

In all honesty I’m pretty sick and tired of seeing followers of Jesus smacking each other around on twitter, Facebook and via blogs.  To those outside the church we must look pretty weak and pathetic.  Note that I’m not saying we can’t debate and argue an issue.  This is more about the very personally derogatory posts that I see.  Sometimes we need to remember that we are destined to spend eternity together! ;)

Many verses from the bible spring to mind in this instance and they are so numerous I won’t list them all but they range from verses about cherishing each other, living in peace, resolving disputes privately, not touching the Lords anointed and many, many more.  Perhaps though, in this instance Rom 12:6-20 springs to mind. Have a read of it now.  As I read this, I feel that a Kingdom culture is one that is positive, forward facing, believes the best and gives the benefit of the doubt.

So here are some bullet points on this issue;

1) I and many others have found it to be true that we have only ever been opposed in ministry by other believers.  Sad but true.  We have become very good at the precise and accurate targeting of deliberate friendly fire.  We talk about the enemy opposing ministry and the apathy in our culture towards the gospel but the reality is this; As an evangelist I have found those apparently outside the Kingdom of God to be hugely interested in our message and willing to engage in quite interesting debate and conversation.  In the last few months the ministry I lead has been subjected to some interesting “attacks”.  Even down to being called a cult and of the devil!  This has only come from my brothers and sisters in Christ.

My view is this. If you have nothing positive to say (critical and positive feedback because you want the best is different) then don’t open your mouth.  (1 thess 5:11)  In my opinion, followers of Jesus are characterised by optimistic hope, not pessimistic cynicism and complaint.

2) If you are so aggrieved that you have something to say and feel personally offended.  Speak to the person privately, ideally face to face.  (Matt 18).  If that person is not easily accessed then write to them.  Washing dirty laundry on twitter or Facebook smacks of low character and sub kingdom behaviour.  I have been truly dismayed at the number of leading figures who use their platform to villify and practically slander others.  To me it doesn’t compute.   It speaks of insecurity, anger and jealousy.  Have nothing to do with it.

3) Leaders of ministries are worthy of double honour.  1Tim 5:18-19.  Somewhere, somehow we lost a culture of honour for leadership.  Does it mean they cannot be corrected?  Of course not.  However there is a way and a means to do so.  You will not find me naming and shaming on the internet.  I will however speak or engage privately with those I have issue with.  I have friends who have taken me aside in the past and on occasion put pen to paper.  The context of love and concern in which they wrote touched my heart and I credit such action as keeping me on the narrow path!  Im grateful this was done privately.

4) Is there a time for ever correcting publicly?  Of course there is.  In the case of heresy, false teaching and dangerous activity.  I personally would only do this however after seeking to resolve privately.  Protecting the church and believers would on occasion call for radical action.

5) Beware factions and cult like followings!  Paul the Apostle seems to lose his rag over this one.  Look at 1Cor1:10-17.  The appeal is to live in harmony.  the enemy of this a teacher or three who has some clever insight that no one else has noticed, therefore gaining a following! (Paul says he didn’t use clever speech in case the cross loses its power…perhaps indicating thats what others may have been doing?)  The answer is to keep the focus on Jesus and his message and work.  As a teacher/evangelist, my job is to point beyond myself to Jesus.  If the pointing is to a particular clever message or ministry then trouble normally follows. (Although you may gain a big following in human terms).

6) On a practical note, if you are doing something new and fresh, expect some flack.  It goes with the territory.

7) Don’t take yourself too seriously but take your mission and the gospel very seriously.  That way you’ll get through the tough times and inevitable criticism.

More to follow on this blog subject in due course.

Grace to you

Carl

 

 

 

 

14Jul

Real men ain’t wimps?

Posted in Carl's Thoughts | 15 Comments

Real men….

Being the leader of the largest UK men’s movement, I’ve been asked more than a few times lately where we are with some of the teaching coming from the United States.

I need to take serious time to start to put my thoughts down in a considered manner but as my schedule through to September is extremely heavy, to say the least, I thought I would begin with a few bullet points.  Come September I hope to have a series of articles in development.  One thing I am convinced of is the need for British men to be speaking to British men…I hope I can deliver that over time.

At this time, my primary concern is not to teach the church on issues of gender but to focus on evangelism.  By this I mean words and actions.  I believe that by reaching men we can start to tackle some of the issues that men face and the sins they perpetrate upon society.  With violence against women “off the chart” and sex trafficking able to thrive because of sex addicted men, the last thing we need is macho posturing.  We need men to use their strength and testosterone in pursuit of more noble causes.

Thats why I founded the movement based around “the code”

So here you go:

1)   Unlike some ministries and individuals we don’t criticise another man or woman’s ministry from the pulpit or blog.  We have enough to do without worrying about targeting friendly fire on each other.  We get on with the job in hand and trust that our own message and teaching will get out there in the end.  What follows is not directed at any individual.

2)   I believe there is no one-way of being a man.  Portraying stereotypes is unhelpful and shallow.  Human beings are far more complex than any stereotype.  People hear my accent and see my build and assume I’m into everything that’s macho and despise anything that looks weak or wimpy.  Assumption is the mother of all catastrophe.  I play piano, write poems and don’t like football.  I also love to cook and don’t mind watching a chick flick with the girls.  However, it is true I also love gadgets, shooting stuff, meat, fire and loud music.  Big deal.  I have testosterone.  Some of my mates who also of course have testosterone like none of these things.  Big deal.  Lets get on with the real task in hand.  Millions are dying without Christ.  We need all our talents, eccentricities and personalities on task.

3)   Projecting ‘macho” as the only type of man speaks to me of deep inadequacy and insecurity.  If you were truly a man (of whatever type) you wouldn’t keep needing to talk about it.  You would simply live it, demonstrate you are truly comfortable in your own skin and point beyond yourself to Jesus.  We tend to bleat on about what we struggle with most.  Be mindful of this next time you get a hobby horse!

4)   I believe people should be allowed to be comfortable to be whatever they have been made by God to be, within the framework that the bible gives us.  Some men will be artistic, others born to lift heavy weights.  One is not superior to the other IMO.

5)   Being a husband is a huge privilege.  The bible tells us to lay down our lives for our wives.  I see myself as the thorn on the rose, protecting the rose so that it can flourish and take the lime light.  I am called to apologise first, take the hit and carry the can.  I love my wife as Christ loved the church….by dying to myself.  Lets talk about that before we talk about anything else.  IMO, if you take the ability to do that away from me I don’t have much else.  This is where feminism goes wrong.  More on this another time.

6)   Men should use their strength to protect the weak and stand against the abuse of power.  There’s a good use for our testosterone.  I can’t think of a better one.

7)   Do I think my wife is weaker and more easily deceived and that for this reason I should be in charge? Of course not! In fact I feel that this sort of teaching massively insults my wife and I take issue with it in the strongest possible terms.  How dare women be spoken of in this way.  In fact, if Genesis is used for that argument we should conclude that men are less intelligent and gullible for eating the fruit offered in the first place.   This smacks of culture deeply affecting the reading of scripture and control stemming from fear.

8)   Every human being is an amazing and stunning creation.  There is no place for bullying, intimidating, harassing, stereotyping or squashing another person or ministry.  Taking strong issue with something is a different matter.

9)   Jesus exercised power and strength with nails through his skin and bone. Sometimes we need to remember this.

10)  My greatest heroes are those who serve humbly, walk diligently before God and lay their lives down.  It’s not about following someone with greater physical strength who can handle himself in a dark alleyway.

Hope that helps for now to at least begin to understand where we are at with some issues.  Don’t forget to check out the code. Its going ballistic and men are finding faith in Jesus through it.

Grace to you
Carl