People love big events.  You get a buzz,  big sound, big names, big crowd…you leave feeling ready to take on the world.  I’ve got nothing against a big event or a mega church.  Both are great for a preach! I just dont think its where the real revolutionary work happens.

Revolution power is in the grass roots.  It always has been.

Last year CVM (Christian Vision for Men) saw its network run at least 4.5k outreach events, that communicated Jesus to tens of thousands of men.  We reached even more through podcasts, magazines and all sorts of creative endeavours. Because we don’t hold it in a stadium or over an event weekend, no ones seen us coming.  We don’t shout about it that often either…

Yeah sure we run big events but we hold them in regions.  We must have seen thousands of men at regional events last year. But no ones seen us coming because we keep it grass roots and regional and only shout about it in the area its happening.

We’ve managed to establish bases from Belfast to Cambodia with another 4 nations scheduled in for the next 24 months.  But no ones seen it coming…you get the drift.

And it’s not just the organisation I lead.  In the grass roots there are radical revolutionaries quietly getting on with it who you have never heard of and probably will never hear from, unless you are in their orbit.

Is that a very British Kingdom revolution?  No it’s just the Kingdom way…and its the most effective.  Crucially it doesn’t require someone to be the biggest gorilla in the room.

A few thoughts on the subject of living and maintaining a HOPE filled life;

Firstly, where does our HOPE come from?  1Peter 1:21 carries a great promise but why is it so hard to come by in the reality of daily life?

Many people suffer with a chronic disease called insecurity.  We get our feelings of apparent security from how we are perceived by others, how successful we apparently are in the eyes of the world and its standards, whether we are popular or not and many other drivers that provide a never ending stream of constant worry, anxiety and lack of fulfillment.  I know because I’ve been there.  I remember walking around years ago outside the community centre where the church I had planted was meeting in 15 minutes time.  I was stressed out telling God I was rubbish at public speaking, rubbish at leading, rubbish at pastoring, rubbish at everything!  It was in that moment of darkness that I heard the Holy Spirit speak to me along these lines;

“yes, thats true your sermons and other stuff havent been that good really…’

What????!!!!!

Talk about kick a man when he’s down!

But then came the killer blow…deep inside I had a sense that God said to me;

“But you are my son and I love you…thats all that matters!”  Its straight out of Romans 8:15 (which is incidentally one of the primary reasons I think that the ministry of the Holy Spirit is so fundamentally important).

It cut me up and went straight to the heart of the matter!  Heres the thing; Who cares how sophisticated, clever, successful etc etc that people think you are.  You are a son of the Living God, the creator of the heavens and the earth.  Its what God thinks that really matters… isn’t it?  Yes, we need to do our best but if you make affirmation from people your primary goal it’ll floor you.

So who cares if you preach a bad sermon despite trying your best, or you’re not the best looking and most popular bloke in the pub.  (I would also add here that sometimes we just need to grow up!)

Once we have our inner security sorted the rest kind of flows from there.  Heres a few more thoughts that follow on from knowing where our HOPE comes from;

• Do Hope filled things. What you do, you become.
• Kill off pessimism and cynicism.  Theres no place for this in Kingdom people.  We are children of light, hope and faith.
• Learn to instinctively believe the best and give the benefit of the doubt. Once you lose the ability to do this and to trust, the enemy has captured your heart.
• Remember that the gospel has a happy ending…we’ve read the last page right?
• You were worth dying for.

In truth I’ve actually spent more years as a bible teacher/pastor than as an evangelist.  As a pastor I had a deep concern to introduce all types of people, from all walks of life, ages, stages to Jesus and to see them grow in faith and understanding.  That concern hasn’t changed.  In fact over the years its grown to be a burning passion and one of the driving forces of my life.  In turn its generated some of my greatest frustrations.  But then, as a much wiser man once said to me; “make your frustrations your friends and they won’t eat you up!”

For the last seven years I’ve been working in a much more specialist field and work predominantly with men and almost exclusively in the area of evangelism by seeking to mobilise, equip and resource the local church to reach all types of men.  We also try to tackle some of the ills in society that men perpetrate and create. Because of this I face some tough and somewhat stretching challenges. In the following, for “we” I’m meaning you, me and the church.

• How do we reach the itunes generation whilst keeping in touch and empowering. with men who don’t know what itunes is?
• How do we reach the builders and the geezers (not necessarily one and the same) without being labelled as being a ministry just for blokes?
• How do we reach the gay community?
• How do we reach the retired men in our community?
• How do we create a brand and an image that is accessible to all, or is that even possible.
• How do we reach the businessman on his second sunseeker yacht.
• How do we reach the white working class young men that the middle classes love to call “Chavs”
• How do we reach the opera lovers as well as the drum and bass fans.
• How do we reach the long term unemployed.
• How do we reach the misfits and the so called “geeks”
• How do we reach the man I see every day, chain smoking outside the working mens club who has chronic liver problems.
• How do we reach the family guy as well as the single man, the grandad and the divorced and struggling.
• How do we help the church reach disabled men?

Over the last few years I’ve been asked what we are doing for every single one of these examples and more and to be honest with you all, its a constant source of frustration and angst.  We recently had a long meeting as a team, addressing some of these questions and hopefully we will stay balanced whilst trying to address the lack of balance in most churches outreach activity.  So far we’ve managed to resource a group reaching the over 50s, developed some resources for the itunes brigade, fathers, students, builders and geezers and dabbled in working in the business community.  We’ve produced resources for footy and film fans (and I don’t even like football)

Theres so much more we want to do but with very limited resources, people, time and crucially money there is only so much we can do at a time.  With the church having been largely chronically unsuccessful at reaching “blue collar men” and the itunes generation, we have been trying to deal with this lately but how successful we are being remains to be seen!

Top Tips for Staying Spiritually Fit

At some point in his life, certainly by the 1630′s and after a period of personal crisis and depression, Oliver Cromwell had experienced an epiphany and embraced a Puritan lifestyle. By 1642 they had taken an axe to the organ at Worcester cathedral and England was at war.

He was a man of intensity in most things and would pray for hours and lived a rigidly disciplined life. I like the discipline but I’m not sure about austerity. Here’s some tips for staying on track with Jesus without becoming an organ destroying Puritan.

1) Get Romans 12 under your skin. The principles work and will keep you sane.

2) Do what you need to do to get praying and getting the bible into your DNA. For some that means a fixed time of prayer and reading but that’s not the only way. Do what works for you; Make lists for prayer and keep copies everywhere. In the toilet, in your wallet, by the tv, by the whiskey bottle… Use objects if necessary. I used to use beads (and I’m no hippy) and each bead was an issue or a person. As I touched each one I would sling a prayer up. If you swim, make each length a prayer, if you smash weights, make each lift a prayer…that gives you some focus! Grunt it out… Get fit and get praying.

3) Make it a goal to memorise chunks of the bible. It doesn’t matter if for a season you read the same bit over and over. During one time of struggle all I read was Psalm 139. I know it off by heart now.

4) Get a language of praise into your life. For people as well as God. Make thankfulness the first thought not complaint (which is the language of the world…listen in to the conversations around you and you’ll see what I mean).

5) Get some disciplines going. A week without TV. A dry month. Take on a challenge for a season that will get you healthy (a fun run, half marathon, diet…) Healthy body equals a healthy mind equals a healthy walk with Jesus.

6) Do stuff that makes you laugh.

7) Be generous (really generous) with your money and your time and don’t expect anything back…you’ll get disappointed. Learn how to serve others without condition.

Dont think too highly of yourself. We are all Gods kids, get over it.

9) Mix with people you wouldn’t instinctively mix with. It’s good for your heart and soul and you may make some surprising friends.

10) Don’t take yourself too seriously but take Gods mission and purposes really seriously.

Any other tips, chuck ‘em in.

Deo Optimo Maximo.

Carl

This is a quick follow up to my previous blog “Jesus is my boyfriend and the culture of the God snog song.” (which I suggest you read with this if you haven’t done so already).

Some years ago, I was ministering in India when I found myself praying for a crowd of people in a small, humid and packed out building/shed.

As I stood on the platform with the interpreter, I noticed a woman moving towards the front. The crowd seemed to part for her and I understood why.  Now hear me correctly when I say that she was mesmerizingly beautiful. It just wasn’t in a sexual manner.  She just carried this amazing sense about her that I find hard to articulate.  There was a peace/shalom about her and grace in her eyes and face that was so compelling,  I couldn’t look away.

When she got to the front, I asked the interpreter to ask her what she wanted prayer for.  The conversation went pretty much like this;

Me; Sandeep please ask what the prayer is for.

Interpreter; “pastor, please just pray…”

Me; “please ask what for”

Interpreter; “can’t you see?”

Me; “See what?”

Interpreter: “please pastor, just look and pray I don’t want to embarrass…”

I was a bit confused but looking around at the woman again, I was for a long moment utterly stunned and a bit confused.  In front of me was a seemingly different woman.  I can feel the emotion of the moment as I type this out for the very first time (although I have told the story before through tears).

The previously beautiful, serene, mesmerisingly beautiful woman was in fact not only a victim of polio, whose arm looked like a little twig but her face was completely scarred from some kind of skin disease…. but I hadn’t seen it before!?  It was definitely however the same woman.

It was at that moment that I felt a deep sense of the Holy Spirit saying to me;

“son, I just let you see her, how I see her all the time…beautiful in my sight…beautiful to me… my precious, precious daughter.”

And for the first time I got it. In fact it broke me and still does to this day.  All of us are simply this; Gods beautiful, precious creations.  People who are dearly loved by a Father in heaven who so loved us that he gave up his one and only son…so that one day every tear will be wiped from our eyes.

It remains to this day, perhaps the most impacting moment of my life alongside meeting Karen, the birth of my daughters and my first encounter with Jesus.  It broke my heart and changed my outlook on my view of mission, Gods heart, women, the poor, worship…the whole deal really.

So do I cry in worship? You bet I do. (And not at bad songs…that just frustrates me)  Do I cry when I read the bible sometimes? Of course I do.  I feel moved to tears by many things; suffering, Gods presence, hope, salvation, longing to be home with God, my family, loss, joy…I could go on.  The truth is I’m an emotional guy, meeting Jesus brought that out in me.  I had to leave the room when I was watching “the time travellers wife” with Karen.  How macho is that!  Sorry to upset all you blokes!

The thing is, I want to make sure we get the fact that at least for me, the debate over men and worship is not about the demonstration of emotion or a reaction against intimacy.

I’m a big fan of the psalms.  In fact one the psalms I repeatedly turn to is 27, which has at its centre;

“One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek, that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple…”

In fact, I know that psalm so well, I haven’t looked it up to write it down.  I have to say, I have zero issue with saying that I will gaze upon the “beauty of the Lord.”

I along with the whole human race have been granted these incredible gifts of emotion and the capacity for love. I separate that from romantic love. It takes great a great lyricist to make that separation clear, its so subtle.

My over riding concern is for those who have yet to encounter the life changing call of Jesus on their lives, not whether I feel great about the songs in church.

The priority for me is the gospel and creating a culture where every man woman and child can experience the deep love of God and the message that by the Holy Spirt we can cry Abba father. (Rom 8:15).

Bottom line, yes I’m probably on old style bloke in many senses but if you see me crying when I preach, when I’m worshipping, or praying for someone and you don’t think that’s manly, in the nicest possible way, that’s for you to deal with.

Deo Optimo Maximo.

*as described by my not yet believing mate…

So here’s a blog on a current and enduring hot potato, men and worship.  Time to point out the elephant in the room, the emperors’ new clothes and buy a Kevlar vest from eBay.

Some bullet points;

• My German shepherd dog “Flick” doesn’t seem to have the capacity to wonder.  It doesn’t look at the stars and think “wow that’s awesome”.  We on the other hand were made with the capacity to wonder, awe, love, adore, praise and worship. To say that we don’t would be to deny that which God has placed in us.

• It’s a big mistake to make this argument about emotion or the demonstration of emotion.  It seems to me that the issue is often confused when people start to talk about men wanting “songs that don’t have emotion in them.” I believe this is a misinterpretation of the issue at hand and its not what men are saying.

• Who is worship and praise ultimately for? Is it for me or God?  If it’s for God why are so many songs focussed on how I feel, how I’m doing, how secure I am etc.  Not that there isn’t a place for this but it seems to me that even in the psalms where David is incredibly vulnerable such as in Psalm 42, he ends by saying “put your hope in God, for yet I will praise Him my saviour and my God.” This effectively puts the final emphasis on God and not himself.   I like that.

• There is a huge spectrum of masculinities out there and to make a simple pronouncement that “this song is/isn’t man friendly” misses the mark and is effectively a shallow interpretation of masculinity.  However, as an evangelist who has noted that the church seems to be pretty empty of builders and van drivers I think we need to do some serious thinking about a culture of worship that helps these missing millions from the UK church engage with God.

• Lets not polarise men and women and stop talking about “man friendly worship.”  Instead lets talk about good, biblical, culturally relevant worship and praise.

• Some people may say that I have issues because I struggle with calling Jesus beautiful beyond description and my lover.  That may well be true.  But then I kind of like those issues and I think I’ll keep them.  Karen is my lover and she is the one who is beautiful to me.   I love Jesus in a different way and would use different language to articulate that love.  For the record, I don’t think Karen likes calling Jesus her lover either.  Thankfully she only has eyes for me

• Jesus was fully God but he was also a man. If I stood next to my closest friend and said, “Stu, your name is like honey on my lips, I’m out of my depth in your love, I love feeling your arms so strong around me…’ I think he would get out of dodge.  I find it hard to sing such lines to a man I worship and love in the agape and not eros sense.  Agape love requires a different approach. I think the church gets confused about the difference.

• Some songs are inadvertently erotic.  For example ; “Jesus take me as I am, I can come no other way, draw me deeper into you.” I’m not seeking to be crude.  In fact there are far worse examples but in the interest of decency I won’t post them.  In the cold light of day the lyrics would look semi pornographic or at the very least not out of place in a Jackie Collins novel and yet we sing them all the time.  I read some lyrics to my unchurched mate and he was wiping tears from his eyes in laughter.

• I was walking with my friend Prem in India once when he reached out and gently held two of my fingers.  To say I was a bit shocked and mildly uncomfortable was an understatement.  Then I noticed that lots of guys were walking hand in hand.  I’ve been to India many times and often hold my friends hands as we walk along.  I kind of like it actually.  However, I wouldn’t do that in Chesterfield. It’s Indian practice and I’m British. It belongs in India as much as cows wandering down main roads.  It’s a case of when in Rome.  Strangely the churches there often sit the men and women separately for worship.  Lets leave that practice there as well!

• I express my deep affection for my male friends in the UK in a different way but it has no less meaning.  Let the British men work out how they express their emotions towards Jesus as the Holy Spirit leads. They don’t need culturally unhelpful references or to be told how they aren’t in touch with their feelings because they aren’t demonstrative enough. Its not helpful.

• It may take courage, as someone suggested recently for a man to say Jesus is beautiful but its just not a helpful missional approach in our culture.  Intimacy with God is crucial but lets recast the language.

• The fact that so many men are aggrieved does indicate there is some problem somewhere, as does the incredibly steep decline in male church attendance.  We cant write it all off to men being out of touch with their emotions etc.

• I was in a church recently and the worship leader opened proceedings by saying “Jesus wants to romance you this morning…” I did find it a bit tricky to engage with.

• Sometimes the pitch of songs is too high for men to sing.

• Men like the volume up, simply because they don’t like to hear themselves singing…but they do like to sing.  They will sing on the terraces and so they will sing in church, if the songs aren’t weak.

• Much of this isn’t about feminisation, its about weak theology and lack of missional thinking.  The fact that we learn so much of our theology from our worship therefore troubles me.

• Sentimental grade one level saxophone solos in the middle of worship will cause (particularly) men and women to shuffle their feet in discomfort.  I don’t mind the solos.  Take Raul D’olivera who plays trumpet at our men’s conferences. Its off the chart! It’s the quality that counts.  If it’s not good, don’t inflict it.

• Why do we only talk about singing when we talk about worship and praise? Are we stuck in a rut?

• Heaven did not touch earth like a “sloppy wet kiss…” Yes sports fans, that really was a line from a hugely popular worship song.

And this leads me to my final thought for now.  Perhaps this debate and all the angst is a symptom of a Church that has lost touch.  Perhaps its navel gazed for so long that its lost sight of reality and the world it was sent to serve? If we were all desperately seeking to see our mates, colleagues and family members meet with Jesus and put our churches at risk in order to engage with the world, then perhaps our worship would change?  Perhaps the inward looking worship culture came from a period of being inward looking?

Just maybe this isn’t about man friendly worship after all.  Perhaps its about creating a world loving, God seeking, hands dirty church that’s worship reflects its heart beat and its desire to engage.

Bottom line, I want to see more women, men and kids meeting Jesus and churches that are healthy for everyone.  Lets get on with it.

“All good poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings”

Wordsworth